How to raise an Unselfish child in a Selfish world? – The Importance of Mercy

How to raise an Unselfish child in a Selfish world?

Part 1 – The Importance of Mercy

It’s S.E.A. season and I can’t tell you how many times I have to check myself and I wonder if I should push hard for the “good school mantra” or not. We all want our children to do and be their best but can we accept their best to be enough. I look at my child and I see every artistic talent that I have and more, (so much more) how can I deliberately put her in this academic box and then convince her to follow her talents later on.  

What do I say: “Just concentrate on S.E.A now and after we’ll change the rules and be different.”    

Didn’t it all work out for us, good school or not. Aren’t we living our life in spite of that drama; aren’t we running businesses, excelling in jobs and persevering. I am and I wished I started sooner.       

I worry that I am teaching my children to be too competitive, selfish at such an early stage in life, as she tries to fulfill my dreams, she’s becoming a little tyrant, maybe a miniature version of me. 

The Power of Mercy

What is Mercy? Compassion or forgiveness shown towards someone whom it is within one’s power to punish or harm. 

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Each generation molds the next generation and yes, we continued where the last generation started, they transformed the dynamics of the world putting the nuclear family above the village and we perfect it.  

We paved the playgrounds because grass was too dirty, we say stay inside and watch TV so your expensive clothes won’t get dirty, we say don’t bother playing with the neighbors children, they’re not like us, watch your tablet instead.  

We tell them don’t feed stray animals because they’ll hang around and then we’ll have to feed them everyday.  

We interview their friends and say who’s good enough, who’s smart enough, who has enough. We strategically move them away from those type of friends we don’t like to those we do.  

We say don’t share your snacks, your lunch, don’t help them with their homework, don’t let them see your answers. We say, I didn’t buy school supplies for you to share with your friends. We tell them not to forgive their classmates, just stop talking to that child, we say. When was the last time we sent our children with something to share with the class for no reason at all. We teach them not to forgive, unkindness and selfishness. They don’t even know what charity means much less mercy. It’s just them and you in the world now and guess what one day they’ll realize you lied to them.  

You see children are genuinely merciful, they are born with mercy written in their very being until we push it out of them. Have you ever noticed how they play, they forgive and forget, they share, they cry for each other, it’s astounding and I wish I can tap into that innocence so easily again.   

I am selfish and it’s hard to push it down and re-train myself some days, because my reflex is bitch mode. It’s even harder to teach my child the things I know I should, when I’m fighting with myself to retain them. You see, mercy to me is sometimes akin to insanity, I admit it, I scream to the heavens, “You got to be kidding me, really!” at least once a month, and that’s a good month.  

Sometimes, I have to admit to her that I was wrong, that she should be kind, she should help in spite of any reservations I may have. She should follow her heart, and begin to hear the voice of God on her own.      

You see mercy is more that just kindness, forgiveness and charity, mercy comes from your soul not your head. Mercy says you’ve done me wrong, and I have the right to chastise you but I’ll forgive you and work with you to be a better person. Mercy is categorized as a noun but it’s really a powerful verb, you demonstrate mercy. These days I just say, “God of the universe help me to get this lesson of mercy without it killing me.” 

Some days i am convinced that my generation is too long gone, there is so much fear in us to help this world but we can stop and step back and give our children’s generation the opportunity to redeem us all.   

Teach your children mercy by showing them mercy, demonstrate by showing mercy to others.  If you want your children to understand divinity give them the gift of mercy.  

Mercy is fearless.

Mercy is freedom. 

Mercy is peace.

 

  

Marsha

@marshagomes

www.marshagomes.com

https://marshagomes.wordpress.com/exploring-words-and-art/

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Duck in the Red Boots an Aunty Marsha Book

Unlike other little ducklings, Duck is quite particular about staying clean. His determination to do just that lands him in quite a pickle every day nevertheless he stands firm for what he believes. This story is a cute reminder that children are people too. They have their own character which when nurtured produces confidence.

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Duck did not like getting his feet dirty at all, at all, at all.

He loved to swim with the other ducklings, but he did not like walking out of the water through the mud. Duck loved flying high in the sky above the trees, but he did not like landing on the dirty ground.

Somehow no matter how hard Duck tried, his feet got dirty every day.One day Duck noticed his feet never touched the ground once he was swimming. So he decided to swim all day long and never come out. Duck swam and swam and swam. He swam up and down the pond. He did the backstroke. He paddled, and he splashed his friends with his wings. The other ducklings rested but not Duck.

I am not going to get my feet dirty today! he quacked

Duck 1The hours passed. One by one the other duckling went home until Duck was all alone in the pond. The water got colder and colder and colder. Duck felt wet and tired. His bill shivered. The feathers stood on his head stood up. As the sky grew dark, he felt lonely and afraid.

“I better fly home,” Duck encouraged himself. “Mom and Dad will be worried about me.”

But his wings were too wet and too cold to fly. Finally, Duck gave in. He took a deep breath and marched right out of the pond, through the icky sticky mud. Squish, Squish, Squish, Slop, Slop, Slop. The mud stuck to his feet. It tingled all over his webbed-toes. Slop, Squish, Slop, Squish, Squoosh, Slop, Squoosh, Slop, Squoosh, Squoosh!

Duck mumbled and grumbled all the way home where his mother gave him a warm bath, and his father made his favorite water grass tea.

The next day, Duck decided he would fly with his friends instead. As Duck flew, he noticed his feet did not get dirty while he was up in the sky.

So guess what? Duck decided to fly and fly and fly and never come down. He flew up and down. He flew high and low. He flew in circles and turned somersaults too. Swoosh, Swoosh, Swoosh! Duck’s wings felt so light in the air. The other ducklings stopped for a rest, but not Duck. He did not want to land on the dirty ground. So he flew, and he flew, and he flew. Duck’s wings got very, very, very tired. They moved more and more slowly, but Duck kept on flying. Then something happened! Duck dropped right out of the sky!

SPLAT!

Into icky, sticky, gooey, wooey mud! Duck got up slowly. His feet were very muddy. His wings were very muddy. His head was very muddy. Duck’s whole body was very, very, very muddy!

Duck was horrified. Once gain Duck mumbled and grumbled all the way home. Duck’s father scrubbed his feathers clean and his mother made his favorite water grass tea. Duck went to his room and vowed to never go outside again.

Day by day Duck’s friends tried to get him to play outside since no one wanted to stay indoors all day when outside was nice and sunny. So Duck was left to play all alone. Soon it was Duck’s birthday. His parents invited all his friends for a party in their backyard. They hoped Duck would go out and play.

On the morning of Duck’s birthday, it rained and rained and rained. Duck looked through his bedroom window sadly. It was so muddy outside. Duck’s birthday party was ruined so he went back to bed.

Later Duck’s grandparents arrived with a special gift.

“Little Duck, why are you still in bed?” grandma quacked as she sat to comfort him.

“Why so sad on your birthday?” quacked grandpa.

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Duck just moaned and rolled over in his bed.

“Maybe opening a present will make you feel better,” grandpa suggested. Grandpa pulled a giant yellow box from behind his back and handed it to Duck.

Duck loved presents. He could not resist opening it. Guess what it was? The most beautiful pair of red boots ever!

Duck put them on and ran outside.

Duck flew and he landed. Plop! No more dusty feet. Duck went swimming and his new boots went too. Glop, Glop, Glop, Squish, Squeak, Squirk! The boots sang as he ran out of the water. No more muddy feet! No more icky toes!

“Wow, now you look like the happiest Duck in the world!” called grandpa.

Later that day when everyone came to the party, Duck marched up and down in his new red boots. He was very happy. From that day on, Duck was known as the Duck in the Red Boots.

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